This valentines Day card speaks for our generation
All fat people: born fat, yo-yo’d fat, side-effect fat, syndrome fat, or however you became fat: You are not a disease, you deserve respect, and you should be honored in the body you’re in because it’s just as wonderful and storied and worthy as the bodies thin people live in. Your existence isn’t a crime; it’s a blessing.
I am surprised by how much sex I have had in my life that I didn’t want to have. Not exactly what’s considered “real” rape, or “date” rape, although it is a kind of rape of the spirit - a dishonest portrayal or distortion of my own desire in order to appease another person.
I said yes because I felt it was too much trouble to say no. I said yes because I didn’t want to have to defend my “no,” qualify it, justify it - deserve it. I said yes because I thought I was so ugly and fat that I should just take sex every time it was offered, because who knew when it would be offered again. I said yes to partners I never wanted in the first place, because to say no at any point after saying yes for so long would make our entire relationship a lie, so I had to keep saying yes in order to keep the “no” I felt a secret. That is such a messed-up way to live, such an awful way to love.
So these days, I say yes only when I mean yes. It does require some vigilance on my part to make sure I don’t just go on sexual automatic pilot and let people do whatever. It forces me to be really honest with myself and others. It makes me remember that loving myself is also about protecting myself and defending my own borders. I say yes to me.
— Margaret Cho, “Yes Means Yes” (via myrisingvoice)
We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.
— Virginia Satir (via dahmeh)
friend sex should be a thing. Like you’re my friend, and we’re really close, so we should have sex. Just cause.
wait, it isnt?